This morning I woke up wondering: ‘What if I had made different choices.
What if my life was not what it is?’
It is easy to believe that the grass is greener on the other side, often I
envy people and their beautiful little lives… As much as my mother always told
me to watch beneath me, and not above me, I cannot do that and will never be able
to. I strive for perfection; I want more, and always more. That will probably
loose me some day. Never being happy with what you have sucks, why can’t I just
enjoy life, enjoy the moment, enjoy the ‘now’?
I always secretly hope that I will give more to my children than my
parents gave us, my brother, my sister and me. The problem is how do you do
that? How do you become rich and famous? ‘Work, work, work’ some will say, but
I believe in luck and being at the right place at the right time. Of course
work is a big part of it but some people work their ass off their entire life for
nothing! They die and worked for nothing….
I need to stop thinking, I need to start living in the now, I need to relax
and try not to control everything. Let's see what life brings…. before I die.
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